My parents have been telling me for years about this crazy thing called adulting, but I never thought the day was going to come. But, ohh honey is it here. Just like anyone, there are things we enjoy about adulting, but also things we do not like. Mine are something along the lines of paying bills, being in a day-to-day routine, grocery shopping, etc.
I miss the days when the only part you despised about grocery shopping was when your mom would call you to come help get the groceries out of the car. Then you'd slip on the first pair of shoes in site, and it would range from your dads lawn mowing shoes to your younger siblings crocs that are 5 sizes too small.. Disclaimer (Chance the Rapper had an awful song come out this year called 'GROCERIES', but in that song there was one line that hit a little different "Used to carry all the groceries in, in one trip (Hercules)"I felt that..
This "chore"is something I dread doing on a weekly basis, but I'm assuming it is for many others as well given the fact you can now Amazon Prime your groceries (This is not an ad). Not only do I dislike it because of the monthly grocery bill being the equivalent of a small rent, but because the way Ty (boyfriend) and I go through groceries you'd think we were feeding a family of 5 (A girls gotta eat).
With the "New Year, New Me" mentality, my list tends to lean towards the "healthier" side. Like any grocery store everything is separated by sections or aisles, which causes me to go through my grocery store "routine" (like I said adulthood is all about routines).
With this routine I tend to pick up all my veggies the first minute I walk in (When in reality, the first place I should be heading is the bar inside.. reasons number 342 I love Wisconsin). I grab my peppers and such along the "vegetation wall". The next item I reach for are the avocados... But do you ever sit back and observe the avocado station? It's filled with basic white girls (yes.. I am a part of this generalization) and mom's with crying children.. My biggest question of all though is, how does one really know how to pick out the perfect avocado? You see everyone grabbing and squeezing these little green mystery boxes trying to determine which lucky ones are coming home with them. This is why I typically follow the little Hispanic lady's technique, because she's the only one that really looks like she knows her way around an avocado (sorry if this offended you).
There is one thing I do like about grocery shopping and that's having the freedom to pick whatever I want, even when sometimes what I want isn't what my bank account wants. I genuinely like grazing along the liquor aisle (When I don't have time to make it to Ray's liquor... They let me bring my dog inside). This is the little spontaneity I look for in my day. I have 100 different options between beer & wine. Like am I going to need that bottle of Sauv Blanc for next Monday's episode of the Bachelor (Victoria P at this point, Victoria F = Crazy) or do I gravitate towards that colorful box of Hazy Little Thing IPA (I recommend).
After my cart is filled to the top, I head towards that overly long check out line (notice how line is singular...) This is the part I hate the most, because I usually have to take out one of my headphones (interrupting one of my Barstool podcasts). In this moment I have to put on my fake customer service voice, like I'm working myself to engage in a conversation with the cashier. The only reason I say this like it's bad thing is because I work in the service industry, and I see how rude it is when people have their phones out ignoring you. But no matter how much you don't want to talk, we all gotta be alert for that paper or plastic question (If you don't bring your own reusable bags or ask for paper.. gtfo).
But wait.. I'm up next to have this unavoidable conversation with Nancy in line 6, and I realize something.. I realize that I forgot to swing by and pick up that cheap golden bottle that I need ohhh so badly. I sit there for a second and contemplate if it's worth running back to aisle 12 to grab it, but then I remember..
I remembered that a few weeks prior I was a cheapskate, and that I didn't wash the unwanted Pantene off my hand. (I know what you're thinking.. Will that one time really hold you over?) Why yes it will! Because since the incident, it hasn't only happened once (If you don't know what I'm talking about, check out my first blog).
Nancy asks me, "Do you have a Metro Market rewards card"? Come on Nancy... Obviously I have a rewards card, and on top of that I have already typed in my cell-phone number (This rewards system is crazy y'all.. I usually save over $20). It's the little things in life.
Even though grocery shopping is one of the things I hate the most about adulting, I think we all need to start looking for positive outcomes from accomplishing the things we dislike the most.
My positive outcomes:
- I get to eat well this week
- I saved $20
- I am no longer under the age of 21 and I get to choose from whatever form of alcohol I want (still no tequila).
- I am able to afford my own groceries
So, go home. Cook yourself up some bomb a$$ tacos, because nobody dislikes tacos. Slice open that mystery avocado (thanks lady, this avocado is perfect). Sit on the couch, kick your feet up, crack open a cold brew and enjoy your weekend!
Cheers Honey!
- Meeks